I love What Not To Wear. Seriously, Clinton and Stacey are literally two of my favorite people to ever grace my television. And thank heavens for tv reruns because I have no idea what I’m going to do without them and all of the fabulousness they bring with them every week. That and getting to see the shops of New York City … that never hurts either.
Now while I’m not going to go outside, pick a random stranger and give them thousands of dollars to revamp their wardrobe, mainly because I don’t have a TV deal and that would getta hella expensive, I am writing this blog post about what not to wear when you’re going on a date at a hockey game. Why? Because trust me, the world needs it.
Hockey is a great sport and one of the best, if not the most exciting one to watch. The game’s extremely fast paced, there’s hot guys on skates, there are fights which sometimes leading to blood, hot guys on skates, an electrified crowd, etc. Oh and there’s also hot guys on skates. But just because there is all this excitement that comes along with hockey games, doesn’t mean you should dress like you’re about to celebrate New Years Eve.
A Short List of What You Should Avoid Wearing To A Hockey Game
High heels – Despite the fact that wearing high heels all the time is actually bad for your health, a sporting event, especially a hockey game, is not the place to show off your favorite pair. First off, hockey arenas are cold, you will need socks. Also, and if you’ve been to a hockey arena before, or another other sporting venue, you know that the floors at these places are absolutely disgusting. I really don’t think you want the bottom of your heels getting scuffed up, even if they are Jessica Simpson brand and you just scored them on 80% off clearance at DSW (holla at ya girl). Now, and to quote Rachel Zoe here, if “you die” (a little quote tweak but it still works) without them and are going to wear heels despite the warning of the nasty and sticky floors, oh and the steep stairs you have to go down in front of thousands of people, at least make them closed toed. If not, your toes may never forgive you. And trust me when I tell you, when there are grown men punching each other on the ice, no one is going to be looking at your pedicure, no matter how cute your new polish color or toe ring that shows your mood is.
Shorty shorts (or shorts in general) – So you’ve been working out more days than not during the week and your legs are lookin’ mighty fine. First off, congrats. Go you. Secondly, and I hate to be the bearer of bad news here, while shorts may give you the opportunity to show off all of your hard work, they are not practical if you’re going on a date to a hockey game. Hockey is played on ice, ice is frozen. Herego, you will freeze your hindquarters off, and not look all that intelligent, if you wear shorts to a hockey game. Please, just say no.
Tank tops – Ok so you’ve still been workin’ out and your arms are lookin’ just like Cameron Diaz’s. Again, you go girl, congratulations. Also, please send me your workout stat, mine doesn’t seem to do anything. Anyways, just like why you shouldn’t wear shorts on a date to a hockey game, tank tops are a no-go too. You will be cold and again people will look at you and wonder what is wrong with your brain. And trust me, guys like a gal in a jersey. And also, jerseys are long sleeves. Therefore, you will look cute and not be cold, all in one convenient top that happens to go along perfectly with the sporting event at which you are attending.
Now these all seem to be pretty obvious no-no’s but go to a game and realize how many people look so out of place that you want to run and hide them behind the nearest Bud Light vendor just so no one else has chance to look at them. After you do that, direct them to this blog for their future reference. They, along with myself, will thank you.
What’s the worst you’ve seen at a hockey game? Share it below!