Surviving A Baseball Game: When Americanism and Girlfriendism Collide

home-field

It’s summer time. Which means hotter temperatures, higher electricity bills and here in the good ole’ US of A summer means one thing, baseball. And quite possibly, summer afternoons or nights spent at your mans team’s ballpark. Sure, you may get lucky on a promotion night and get to see fireworks or get a bobblehead because you were one of the first 20,000 fans in the stadium but most of the time it’ll be sweaty days watching people going crazy because of what’s going on in game or yelling at the poor tourists who just decided to explore a new city when their team was in town, while simultaneously eating jumbo hot dogs, slurping beer, and throwing peanut shells on the ground.

Now, we all make sacrifices for the people we care about, so just remember that when he presents you with bleacher seats for an upcoming game, grin, bear it, and take the whole experience in stride. And who knows? Maybe you’ll really enjoy yourself. And even if you don’t, baseball games are great places to get some sun and more importantly, try out that new braid hairstyle you just found on Pinterest to go with your brand new baseball hat. Sidenote, nothing covers up a bad hair day like a ball cap.

Some Survival Tips/Options/Ideas to Make Your Day Not Suck

If you’ve never done it before, or even if you have, ask your guy to get a scorecard and help you fill it out. Not only will you get some better understanding of the game, you and your guy will get to share those precious moments together so it won’t seem as bad later when he’s ignoring you because it’s the bottom of the 9th inning and the opposing teams big-hitter just stepped up to bat with 2 outs and runners on the corners (first and third base).

Offer to buy a round of beer. Not only will your guy love you even more because a. you are bringing beer and b. it means he doesn’t have to get up, you’ll get the chance to explore the stadium and get a feel for the atmosphere of America’s pastime. And quite possibly more importantly, you’ll get to take a break from watching the game. Because let’s face it, even if you are a diehard fan, baseball games can drag like none other.

Some baseball terms to impress any guy:

Here are just a few not as common words that you should try and work into your game day vocabulary. That, or another option is to eat some hot dogs a la Katherine Heigl in The Ugly Truth. Make sure you let me know how that one works out for ya.

Caught looking: When a player strikes out without swinging. Kind of like when you’re shopping and you see this dress that you aren’t sure if you want or not. You’re contemplating going for it when suddenly, someone swoops in and takes it. Bam, you’re out. (And not to mention you lost the dress)

Use in sentence: How did he get caught looking, all he had to do was swing his bat?!

Double Play: This one is simple, it’s two outs in the same at-bat, just like the name says. Occurs commonly when a runner is on first and he tries to make it to second on the next hit. This runner is out, and the one who hit the ball is out at first. (This is a common baseball word yes and this list is supposed to be more uncommon ones. I felt that this was important enough to break that barrier,)

Use in sentence: “Oh-my double play. Now that’s how you end an inning.” (use excitement here)

Some Pitch Names: Curveball, fastball, sinker, slider. Just throw some out there randomly during the game, he’ll probably be too amazed to say anything even if you called out the wrong pitch. And if you aren’t close to home plate, chances are he couldn’t see it either and has no idea if you are right or wrong.

Use in sentence: Man, (insert pitcher name here) sure is throwing some heat with that fastball today.

Save: When a new pitcher comes into the game with the lead and the games ends with him never losing it or letting the game get to a tie. Usually closers, designated pitchers signed to “close” games, are the ones who get saves.

Use in sentence: I was getting a little nervous when he walked the first batter but thank heavens (insert closer name here) got it done and got the save.

Walk-off: A hit that drives in a run to end the game. Only a batter for the home team can hit this in the bottom of the ninth or in extra innings if the game is tied after 9. If the home team is winning after the opposing team bats in the top of the ninth, the game is over and a walk-off situation is not possible.

Use in sentence: How exciting would a walk-off home run be right now?

I hope this post helped quell some of your fears about going to a baseball game with your guy. Now I’m sure he’ll say you don’t have to come, but it’s nice to share these different experiences with each other. And when you want to share the experience of the upcoming department store sale with him, I’m sure he is going to be more than happy to oblige.

Been to a baseball game with your guy and lived to tell the tale? Fill the rest of us in on your experience in the comments!

Don’t forget the Cracker Jack!

Court

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